In this week's parasha, Lech Lecha, the Torah tells us that Hashem took Avraham Avinu outside and said to him, הַבֶּט נָא הַשָּׁמַיְמָה וּסְפֹר הַכּוֹכָבִים — "Look toward the heavens and count the stars." Rashi explains that Avraham had seen in the stars that he was not destined to have a child. Hashem told him, צֵא מֵאִצְטַגְנִינוּת שֶׁלְּךָ — "Leave your astrology behind." What appeared to be written in the stars did not have to determine his future. The Gemara tells us, אֵין מַזָּל לְיִשְׂרָאֵל — the Jewish people are not bound by mazal. Even if something appears to be a person's destiny, Hashem can change it in an instant. Our tefillot and good deeds have tremendous power, and we should never feel that our future is already determined because of what it looks like today.
A beautiful story was told about a religious couple in Israel, Yosef Chaim and Bracha. Exactly one year after their wedding, Bracha gave birth to their first child, a baby boy. The birth went smoothly, and the young couple was overjoyed. But the following day, their happiness was shattered. The doctors informed them that their baby had cerebral palsy. They said their son would never walk, would never speak, and would have very limited development. They then advised them not to bring the baby home. They suggested leaving him in the hospital or placing him in an institution. "You're a young couple just starting out," they told them. "Why take on such a burden? Leave him here and continue on with your lives."
The couple was devastated. They had dreamed of bringing home a healthy baby, and suddenly they were being told that their son would never be able to do the most basic things. But when they held their little baby in their arms, they felt an overwhelming love for him. They looked at each other and made a decision. This child was the child Hashem had chosen to give them, and they were going to raise him with all the love and devotion they possibly could. They would do whatever they could to help him develop. They named him Menachem Mendel.
The years that followed required tremendous effort and dedication. They invested enormous amounts of time, energy, and resources into helping Mendel develop. And then, despite the doctors' predictions, at the age of four, Mendel began to walk and talk. The parents, who had been told that their son would never take a step or say a word, were now watching him do both.
As the years passed, Bracha and Yosef Chaim were blessed with more children, but they never stopped investing in Mendel. They included him in every family trip and made sure he was always part of everything they did. Eventually, they celebrated Mendel's bar mitzvah. The child whom the doctors had said should be left in an institution was now putting on tefillin and doing mitzvot with great joy, excited about his life like any other child. At his bar mitzvah, the family showed a film called "A Day in the Life of Mendel." It showed him going through his daily routine, from washing his hands in the morning to saying Shema at night, carefully performing mitzvot with a smile on his face. The people watching were moved to tears. Here was a boy who had been given such a bleak prognosis, yet he was living a beautiful life filled with Torah and mitzvot.
Bracha later shared a powerful message from her experience. She said that if parents discover their child has a disability, the initial shock and grief are natural, but they must not remain trapped in mourning the child they imagined having. They have to embrace the child Hashem gave them. If parents are embarrassed by their child and hide him away, the child may learn to feel ashamed of himself. But when parents believe in their child, love him, and accept him with all his challenges, that gives him the confidence and encouragement to develop to the best of his abilities. She said parents should constantly remind themselves, "This is the gift Hashem gave us, and we're going to do our very best with him."
The doctors had told this couple that their son would never walk and never speak, yet he ended up doing both. At the time, it seemed there was no possibility of anything different. But at the age of four, he began walking and speaking, and years later, he was celebrating his bar mitzvah, putting on tefillin, and living a life filled with Torah and mitzvot. This is the lesson Hashem taught Avraham Avinu when He told him to leave his astrology behind. No matter how certain something may look, no matter what anybody says, the future is never beyond Hashem's ability to change. We are never bound by what appears to be our destiny.
Shabbat Shalom.