Yesterday, we mentioned from the Bet HaLevi that when a person does a sin that is a clear sin, he groans, he feels bad, and is therefore able to do Teshuva.
On the other hand, with a sin that is not out in the open, that is not apparent, so it is harder to do Teshuva.
This concept shows up in Rabbenu Yonah in his commentary on the Rif, in Berachot, where he says that a person has to be careful on a doubt, more so than on something that is for sure:
It’s the main fear of God to be careful and stay away from situations of doubt, because the punishment for a doubt is greater than for a sin for something definite. How so? The Gemarah in Masechet Zevachim (48a) tells us that there are two types of sin- offerings. One is for a person that definitely sinned by mistake. For example, he opened the refrigerator while he wasn’t paying attention and he ate an unkosher product. He has to bring a Korban Chatat.
Then there was another person who opened the refrigerator with two bags inside. One was his lunch, and one was the housekeeper’s lunch. He ate one, and the housekeeper ate one, but they don’t know who ate what, and they will never find out. There is a korban for that called Asham Talui. It’s a guilt offering that’s ‘hanging’- We don’t know if he did the sin or not. The Korban Chattat is cheaper than the Korban Asham.
When he is certain he did the sin, he pays less than when he is in doubt.
This seems counterintuitive. Why is it stricter on doubt than it is on something definite?
Rabbenu Yonah answers that
שעל הודאי משים האדם החטא אל לבו ודואג ומתחרט עליו וחוזר תשובה שלמה
When it’s certain, you put it in your heart. It hurts you and you worry. You regret it. And you return in full Teshuva.
But when it comes to a doubt, you start with logic, reasons and excuses.
So if you ate something in the airport and you weren’t sure whether it was kosher, you assumed it probably was, and by the time Yom Kippur came around, you forgot all about it. But if you ate something that was definitely unkosher, you still feel bad about it three years later.
The nature of the beast is that when it is not clear-cut, we try to justify it. We try to make it work it and smooth it out. But when something is out in the open and clearly wrong, it’s harder to do that.
Sinat Hinam is, by nature, a sin of safek/doubt. It is very hard. There is no unkosher symbol, it doesn’t say unkosher gelatin, and there is a lot of wiggle room. That is why it is so hard to do to Teshuva. That is why we still are where we are.
Have a wonderful day.