Lesson #40: The Deceased
Imagine two people walking out of a funeral, and one says to the other, “Did you hear what the Rabbi said about him? I mean, come on! He made him sound like Sadik. We both know that he was a stingy old man who was very hard to get along with.”
Does this violate the prohibition of Lashon Ha’ra? Is it forbidden to speak negatively about somebody who is no longer alive? And must the listener try to defend the deceased, and cast him in a favorable light?
Remarkably, Halacha forbids speaking Lashon Ha’ra even about the deceased. Regardless of whether the deceased was a Torah scholar or somebody with little Torah knowledge, it is prohibited to speak negatively about him. All the more so, it is forbidden to degrade a Torah scholar after his passing, or degrade his teaching and scholarship.
And so, in the story related above, it would be proper for the listener to respond, “Look, let’s try to remember him for the good things. Let’s remember how he was good to his family and to the people around him.” This is how we should speak about people, whether they are still alive or no longer with us.
We all want to be remembered for our fine qualities, and for the good things that we do. This is the way we should remember other people, as well.