Lesson 5: The Magnified Sin
We all remember the time when, in the summer of 2014, three Israeli teenagers were kidnapped and murdered by terrorists. During those days of uncertainty, everybody in Kelal Yisrael, on all levels of religious observance, strove to perform extra Misvot as a source of merit for those three precious boys. We consulted with a certain Torah sage, and he instructed that in our synagogue we should continue reciting a special prayer at the time of the opening of the Hechal, but in addition, we should extend our night Seder (Torah learning session) for an extra minute or two. And so we made an announcement that our night Seder, which normally ended with Arbit at 10pm, would end instead at 10:02pm, as an extra Zechut for these three boys.
I remember that after Arbit, somebody came over to me and said, “Come on, two minutes?! What are those two minutes going to do?”
I explained to him that these two minutes were two minutes spent by some one hundred men learning Torah. By extending the Seder two minutes, we added 200 minutes of Torah study for this cause.
The significance of our efforts is measured not simply by what we actually do, but also by the impact these efforts have. A small act which impacts a large number of people becomes exceedingly significant because of its large-scale effects.
We must realize, however, that this works in the opposite direction, as well. Although speaking Lashon Ha’ra even to just one person is strictly forbidden, the sin becomes magnified exponentially when Lashon Ha’ra is spoken to a large audience. Conveying negative information about somebody to a group of people has a far greater harmful impact than sharing it with just one person, and so the sin is much more grievous. Thus, speaking to ten people multiplies the sin tenfold; each word of Lashon Ha’ra spoken to those ten people is equivalent to ten words of Lashon Ha’ra. We must therefore be especially careful when speaking with groups of people, not to convey any derogatory information about somebody.
Many people might not realize that even a statement which is not inherently derogatory, but could be interpreted as such, may not be spoken. Often, the permissibility of a remark depends on factors such as context, intonation, and facial expression. For example, if somebody says, “The kids in that family are really leibidik (spirited),” this could mean either that the children have spunk, charm and enthusiasm, or that they are very wild and out of control. Whether or not such a statement is allowed depends on how it is spoken and in what context. Another example is saying about a certain family, “They’re always cooking.” This could mean that the family is exceptionally hospitable and frequently hosting guests, or that they inappropriately overindulge in food. Once again, it depends on the way this was communicated and in what context it was said.
If the person about whom the statement is made is present at the time, then the statement is allowed, because the speaker presumably would not intend to make a derogatory remark about somebody in his presence. If he is standing there, then the intent is clearly complimentary and not offensive. Generally, however, we must exercise extreme caution, particularly when speaking with a group of people, not to say anything about somebody which could be interpreted as pejorative to that person.