Lesson #96: The Parking Spot
A man is walking home one day when he sees a parked car partially blocking his neighbor’s driveway. His neighbor, Albert, is standing there, his face beet red, and steam coming out of his ears. As a good neighbor, the fellow walks up to Albert to see if he can somehow diffuse the situation.
“How are you Albert?” he asks.
“Furious!” Albert shouts, pointing at the car. “I know exactly whose car this is!” He says the name – it’s another neighbor up the block, someone whom they both know. “I’m going to get back at him! I’m going to slash his tires. He’s going to pay. He has no idea whom he’s dealing with!”
The other fellow knows the owner of the car quite well, and knows that he is a good, decent fellow, who would not intentionally block Albert’s driveway. He figures that the car’s owner probably was having trouble finding a spot, and so he took the first space he saw after circling for a long time, not realizing that the car extended into part of Albert’s driveway.
And, this man knows that Albert has quite a temper, and is the type of person who really would slash the car’s tires, or do something even worse. Indeed, Albert has already done some pretty crazy things in the past… He thinks that it might be a good idea to quickly run over to the car owner’s home and warn him that Albert is fuming and threatened to damage his car, and to advise him to immediately move his car away from Albert’s driveway.
Halacha allows the neighbor to convey this information to the car owner, and this is not considered Rechilut (sharing information which arouses hostility between two Jews), because the information is shared for a constructive purpose. Since the neighbor knows that Albert is the kind of person who would damage the car, he is permitted to tell the car’s owner about Albert’s threat so he can protect his property. The only exception would be if the neighbor knows that the car’s owner is also hot-tempered, such that he might react in a hostile manner to the news of Albert’s threat. In such a situation, informing the car’s owner of Albert’s threat would likely trigger a full-blown fight, and is therefore forbidden. But otherwise, if the neighbor knows that the car’s owner is a reasonable, level-headed fellow, then he may inform him of Albert’s threat so he can protect himself.
Of course, it would be proper to also politely advise him to exercise greater caution in the future, and ensure not to block driveways.
Tensions between neighbors is, unfortunately, quite common. In my experience, I have found that the ones who advocate for peaceful resolutions to conflicts end up receiving great blessings. Often, advocating for a peaceful resolution is difficult, because it invites criticism and resentment from both sides. But ultimately, when working to bring peace between people, there is a golden pot at the end of the bumpy rainbow, and one earns great reward for such efforts.