The Torah states in Parashat Ki-Tavo, והלכת בדרכיו – “You shall follow His ways” (28:9). The Rambam understands this pasuk as establishing a Torah obligation to resemble Hashem, by following His example. Just as Hashem is רחום וחנון – compassionate and merciful – we, too, are to be compassionate and merciful to other people.
This mitzvah, I believe, is telling us something very important, and very profound. We need to be merciful to other people because we, too, need mercy.
We are all in the same boat. We all have struggles. We all do some things right, and do some things wrong. We all succeed in some ways, and we all fail in some ways. We all mess up on occasion. Every one of us, without exception, needs Hashem’s mercy and compassion. And so when we see somebody else who is struggling, who needs help, who messed up, who failed – we need to show compassion.
So many of us silently relish other people’s mistakes and failures. When we hear about other people who are dealing with some difficult problem or crisis, there is often a part of us that celebrates the opportunity to feel superior, to feel that we’ve got our lives more in order than that person. Of course, we would never communicate these feelings, and, of course, we will certainly try to help if we can. We’re not mean, and we’re not bad people! But somewhere deep inside, we feel gratified to hear that somebody is struggling, because it allows us to feel that we’re doing better than others.
But this feeling of gratification is so fake. We all struggle, we all fail sometimes, we all have problems. מה הוא רחום, אף אתה היה רחום. We all require Hashem’s mercy and kindness, so we should extend mercy and kindness to others, as well. When we hear of somebody who is struggling, we must remember that we struggle, too. We aren’t necessarily any better.
Somebody once approached Rav Avigdor Miller and asked how he should prepare for the judgment of Rosh Hashanah.
Rav Miller looked at him and said: “Smile!”
The fellow was startled. Smile? This is what we should do to prepare for our judgment? Few of us would ever have included “smile” in our list of 20 things we should be doing to get ourselves ready for Rosh Hashanah.
Rav Miller explained by way of an analogy to a businessman who owned a chain of retail stores that were losing business. He proceeded to review all the stores and take inventory, to determine which products should be sold at a discounted price, which stores to close, and which employees to lay off.
As he spoke to the manager of one store, the manager told him that a certain employee needed to remain, and could not be fired under any circumstances.
“This guy is so warm and friendly,” the manager explained. “He greets every customer with a smile, and makes them feel welcome. People come into the store just because of him and his smile. He cannot be laid off.”
If we smile and are friendly to all of Hashem’s “customers,” Rav Miller explained, we can’t be “laid off.” We are needed. If we make people feel good about themselves, if we uplift them, if we are encouraging and helpful, then we are worthy of a favorable judgment.
The best thing we can do to help ourselves going into Rosh Hashanah is to smile to everyone, to show everyone compassion and graciousness, to realize that we are all in the same boat, that we all struggle. If we smile and act kindly to others, then Hashem will smile and act kindly to us, and inscribe us for a happy, healthy, prosperous year, amen.