In the Book of Melachim I (chapter 20), we read of a certain war that was waged, and before one of the battles, the prophet came to the King of Israel and gave him advice. He said:הסר המלכים איש ממקמו ושים פחות תחתיהם – instead of having noblemen (מלכים) fight the battle, the king should instead summon פחות – ordinary, simple people.
The Metzudat David commentary explains that the noblemen, due to their stature, value their lives, and so they would not expose themselves to danger by exerting great effort during battle. The would be too afraid to show courage and daring. The simple peasants, however, unfortunately, did not value their lives as much, and so they would fight fearlessly, not worried about risking their lives.
Leaving aside the many different aspects of this story that need to be explained, there is a very clear, and very important, message that we learn. The more we value ourselves, the more we take good care of ourselves. If we do not think that much of ourselves, we are more willing to get into the mud, to be reckless and careless.
The Hebrew word for “respect” is כבוד, a derivative of the word כבד, which means “heavy.” And the antonym of respect, the word used for silly, meaningless behavior, is קלות – which is derived from the word קל, or “light.” If we are “heavy,” if we have substance, then we respect ourselves and earn the respect of others. But if we are “light,” and we do not recognize our great value and worth, then we waste our time on silliness.
This point, I believe, is our most critical weapon in our ongoing struggle against the social media companies, and the other companies that produce material which consume so many hours of our time. They are counting on the fact that we feel קל, that we do not value ourselves. If we do not value ourselves, then we do no value our time, and so we will waste it on meaningless activities. But if we feel כבד – that we are important, we are precious, we have the potential for greatness, then we will use our time in a manner of כבוד, with self-respect. Once we realize that we are מלכים, that we are royalty, we will be far more careful about how we spend our time and what we allow to enter our minds.
Parashat Toldot tells the story of the time when Esav was out hunting, and he returned home, tired and hungry. His brother, Yaakov, was preparing a stew, and Esav asked him for some food. Yaakov asked Esav to sell his rights as the firstborn in exchange for food, and Esav replied, הנה אנוכי הולך למות, ולמה זה לי בכורה – “I’m anyway going to die, so what do I need the birthright for?!”
It was at this point when Yaakov knew with full confidence that Esav did not deserve the special privileges and responsibilities of the firstborn.
The realization that אנוכי הולך למות, that we are mortal, that our lives are finite, should motivate and drive us to value our time even more, to use our time productively. Esav, however, said the exact opposite – that since he was in any event going to die, there was no reason to pursue greatness. Such a person cannot be a founder of Am Yisrael.
Each one of us is special, is כבד, laden with talents, with skills, with goodness, with limitless potential. What a shame it would be to waste our time on nonsense, on vanity, on meaningless pursuits!
Let us all always remain aware of just how great and precious we all are, and by learning to value ourselves, we will value our time, and use it wisely.