In the beginning of this week’s Parasha, Ki Tetzeh, the Torah speaks about the בן סורר ומורה – the wayward son who veered off the proper path. The Gemara tells us in Masechet Berachot (daf 8) that having a child in the family who is off the derech is more difficult for the family than the war of Gog u’Magog. Unfortunately today, many families are going through this suffering. Even parents who have honestly dedicated themselves to giving their children the proper chinuch are experiencing this nightmare in their home. Their lives have been completely overturned and they long for the day that their child will come back. Baruch Hashem, we have seen many of these children indeed return to the ways of Torah and mitzvot, and we hope to see many more. Parents should never give up on trying to bring their child back. Even one line of inspiration or one experience can completely change their outlook on life. The parents need to pray that Hashem sends their child the right shaliach to give him or her the inspiration they need to come back. In one moment, all of the bitterness and hardship could come to an end.

A man, who we’ll call Avraham, related that he was planning to travel overseas for a family wedding and made all the necessary arrangements. He ordered a driver to pick him up at 7:30 am, having to be in the airport by 9:00, which was about an hour and a quarter from his house. That morning, Avraham somehow overslept and woke up at 6:40. If he would leave at 7:30 as planned, he would miss minyan. On the other hand, if he went to minyan, he might miss the flight and the wedding and lose the money he spent on the flight and disappoint his whole family. He decided he had to go to minyan and he was going to do his best to still make it on time. He called the driver and said he’s going to start paying him from 7:30 as they agreed, and he explained how he woke up late and wanted to go to minyan first. He prayed the entire tefila and then got into the car, leaving at 8:20.

On the way to the airport, the driver shared his unfortunate life story with Avraham. He said he used to learn in an excellent yeshiva and was a top bachur, and now he looked completely secular. Realizing that Avraham was in doubt about the veracity of his story, he started quoting gemarot that he remembered from his past. Avraham then asked him what happened. He replied, he had a friend that for whatever reason he began to compete with. Who would get up earlier? Who would learn more? Who would get higher grades? That pressure caused him to push himself too far until he fell apart and became disgusted with everything he was doing. He continued, “Today, as I was waiting for you, I said to myself, look at him, a Jew who is willing to give up everything in order to pray with a minyan. He could miss his flight and suffer many consequences, but he wants to do what Hashem wants. This is a Jew not serving Hashem to compete with someone else, or for some personal gain, but rather with true sincerity. I suddenly realized this is for real. If you could do it, why can’t I? I could pray with minyan as well, and tomorrow I’m going to start.” He finished off by thanking Avraham, telling him that this experience just changed his life for the better.

We never know what might inspire someone to come back to Hashem. Everyone is different and gets inspired differently and Hashem could always send the perfect messenger to give the inspiration that He knows will work. Parents should spend extra time in the beracha of השיבנו אבינו לתורתך in the Amida to beg Hashem to guide their children in the right direction.

Shabbat Shalom.

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