We've discussed many times that there's a thing called Lashon Hara leto'elet, constructive purpose. A person might cheat somebody, or a person may enter into a marriage unknowingly, not knowing that there is a defect in the potential mate. It turns out that the people have to know that something must be done, and sometimes something must be said. But we have listed seven preconditions for someone to speak what's considered improper Lashon Hara speech, negative information or harmful information about another person, but it's leto'elet. We need to do it to save a bad marriage, save a bad business deal, or address a health problem. So, on the list of seven, you have to verify it yourself. You have to tell the minimum. You have to clarify the situation before you can even call it constructive. One of the seven is that to'elet is permitted for a constructive purpose, so long as our intentions are pure. As long as we're doing it for the proper reason—not 90%, not 95%, but 100%.
So the Chafetz Chaim, in Klal Yud, in paragraphs 11 and 12—Klal is usually a chapter, chapter 10—shows us that it's not so pashut (simple). It's not so simple for a person to say, “Look, I'm doing it for to'elet.” Suppose a person was once cheated in business, and so he wants to publicize the matter to protect others from being cheated—not so he can reclaim his money, because that's a different course of action. But in such a case, he's not allowed to report the information for a constructive purpose, even though he may list all seven conditions and say that he met them. What's the flaw? The flaw in the reasoning, says the Chafetz Chaim, is that when a person's misdeed affects somebody—that somebody, that John Doe, that Ploni Almoni—by causing embarrassment, physical harm, or financial loss, it's inconceivable that when you deal with that perpetrator, your motives can be perfectly pure without wanting to get him back or letting other people know he's not as he seems. He is letting other people know that what I went through is not uncommon to this person's personality or modus operandi. Bingo, your pure intentions just went out the window. You either get satisfaction from tripping the guy up in the new deal or from letting others know who he really is. He's not what he's made out to be. You want shame and scorn for him because of what he did to you, and that now removes this conversation or this report from to'elet to asur, from constructive purpose to forbidden.
On the other hand, if you had seen someone else being cheated and you knew that the cheater would not listen to your direct rebuke, you're permitted to publicize his misdeed to prevent others from being harmed, from being cheated by this dishonest person, or from looking at him, admiring him, and following his ways and saying, “Look, nothing happens to him, and he's a big shot and a respected person, so I guess it's okay.”
The Chafetz Chaim comments that, given the above, everybody should realize that we have to refrain from speaking about anyone who indirectly hurt us, either because they didn't fulfill an interpersonal relationship obligation or because they didn't deal honestly in a business transaction. This includes anyone in a whole list of interactions between people where the person's negative behavior or less than perfect behavior might become known to others to prevent further harm. The Chafetz Chaim says this is Lashon Hara, but it's all too common for people to do this. Let's say somebody comes to collect Tzedakah (charity). He gets a list of potential people, goes into a building, and starts working the floors, which is a little more difficult today post-corona. He's going throughout the community, and he heard it's going to be a bonanza. When he's ready to leave, he looks at his books, and it's quite disappointing. He didn't come close to what he expected, and some of the more famous, more generous, or bigger donors didn't give him anything at all.
He may say, “Look, when I go home, I have to tell the other guys it ain't what it's made out to be. I have to warn them to protect them from spending time, effort, and money to come here when they're not going to get what they anticipate.” Guess what? He's not allowed. In this example, it's almost impossible for the fundraiser to figure out why he wasn't successful. Maybe it's just a bad year in that town. They're in a certain business overall. That business is weak this year, but if you came next year, it'd be okay. If you came in six months, it might be okay. Maybe his approach was lacking in convincing the people that his firm or his cause deserved the help they normally give other people. Or it could be that the guy who told them no just has tough times; he's not doing well right now. Or he gives so much to almanot (widows) and so much to schools and so much to Kollel (Torah study institution), and this guy's here for Kollel and he gave out his Kollel budget. So there are many justifiable reasons why a person might not give him that are not bad.
So for him to relate it and hurt the person's reputation by saying, “Look, I went to this town, and I didn't get what I'm supposed to. They're really cheap; they really hold back,” is wrong. The Chafetz Chaim writes that if, because of this, he disgraces an entire community by saying, “Don't go here,” he has committed a dreadful sin, as he calls it, even when the information is true, as we've already written. And even when one speaks against a specific individual, if one is talking about a community—the residents of an area, a town or a neighborhood, or a religious community in a certain big city—it's forbidden to speak against an entire community. They believe in Hashem, they follow Mitzvot (commandments), and they didn't give you. Surely, says the Chafetz Chaim, that is a great sin.
So basically, today's lesson is that when it says you have to be sure it's leto'elet, it's for a positive purpose, and you have to be sure you're not prejudiced in the matter. You have to clarify that this person you're speaking about never actually caused harm, embarrassment, or upset to you in any way regarding any issue. Because then you are prejudiced against him. And you'll find an allowance: “No, it's the to'elet.” It's not the to'elet. It's to get him back, or to let people know, or, or, or. But it's not for a constructive purpose to help the person. And that's what we have to understand. When you've got personal motives, or you have personal losses, or personal harm or embarrassment caused by a person, it becomes very difficult to speak about that person because your feelings are negative before you start. And therefore, you can't say it's purely to'elet, purely for a constructive purpose.