Yosef now reveals his identity: “I am Yosef. I am Yosef. I'm your brother, Yosef.” Now, we all look at it as a very emotional moment; they're reunited. But if you look at it in reality, in context, it's not supposed to be an emotional moment, because now they realize that the man they tried to kill is alive. So if you shoot a gun at somebody's head and miss, the person doesn't come over to you and give you a hug. So now, 20 years later, they're finding out that the gun they shot missed, and that the brother they threw into the ditch, the brother they told their father was dead, the brother who was sold down to Egypt and left for dead, is now the king of the world. That's not emotional. For any normal king, that's supposed to be the moment it's over for them. “Hi, boys. You guys tried to kill me. Now you lost; I'm in power. It's over for you.” If you're not sure, go to any third world country and see what happens when someone tries to rebel against the king and misses. It's over.
And here's what Yosef does: He kisses his brothers, and he cries on their shoulders. And then his brothers spoke to him. Why did they speak to him? In the beginning, they were very embarrassed: “We tried to kill him. He's alive now; we're in trouble.” But here's what Yosef said. Yosef said, “Maybe you're right. A normal king would literally kill you now, or at least put you in a dungeon for eternity.” He says, “But here's what I know.” He says these words in the Pasuk (verse): “You did not send me here.” He continues, “I know you tried to bring back my demise. I know you tried to kill me. I know you tried to throw me in a ditch. I know you tried to kill me. I know you tried to sell me. I know you tried to ruin me completely. But in my book, it's not you. So don't worry about it. It's okay. Hashem sent me here.”
The Sforno says on this Pasuk that Yosef was saying to his brothers, “I don't look at it as you. I look at it as this is what Hashem did, and this is what Hashem wanted. So it's okay.” Here's Yosef, whose brothers did one of the most egregious things one brother could ever do to another. In the history of the Jewish people, there may be brothers who don't talk, and there may be brothers who are fighting, but there are very few brothers who ever did what Yosef's brothers did to him. And you know what Yosef does? “It's okay. It doesn't define you. It was a bad moment, it was from Hashem, and that's it.”