During the days of Aseret Yemei Teshuva/Ten Days of Repentance, we say Avinu Malkenu/Our Father Our King. Hashem has both qualities. He is our Father, and a father loves his son. But not all fathers can do what they like because they might be lacking in resources. A king, however, can do whatever he wants, although he may not always want to do it. So Our Father, Our King means that Hashem loves us like a father, and He is our King, so He can do whatever He wants for us. He is Avinu Malkenu.
On Rosh Hashanah, we focus on Hashem being a King. He is the Melech. But on Yom Kippur, we put on a different cap. We look at Hashem not in a king/servant relationship, but as a father/son relationship. אם
כבנים, אם בעבדים- Sometimes like we are children, and sometimes like servants.
The Mishnah says in Masechet Yoma,
“Fortunate are the Jewish people- in front of whom do you purify yourselves? And who purifies you?
Your Father in Heaven.”
That’s what brings about the purity of Yom Kippur, that we are Hashem’s children, and He is our father. That is the ABCs of bitachon. He is our father, we rely on Him, and He is going to take care of us.
This is where the teshuva and forgiveness of Yom Kippur comes from. We have to have that feeling and connection, the father/son approach.
There is an early Midrash called Pisketa D’Rav Kahana, which says that Hashem told Yirmiyah to tell the Jewish people to do Teshuva and they said, “Our master Yirmiyah, how can we do Teshuva? Do you know how much we angered God? Do you know how much we taunted God? We are covered in embarrassment.”
Yirmiyah sent the message back to God, and God said to tell the Jewish people, “If you are coming back to your Father in heaven, it is a whole different approach. You don’t know how much the father is waiting for the son.”
A father waits for his son more than the son waits for his father.
There’s a story told about a man on a long train ride- for example from Manhattan to Boston. While on the train, the passenger saw a young man who looked disheveled and disturbed. The man asked him what had happened, and the young man told him that he had been a rebellious teenager who went off on his own, started a business, and became wealthy. His parents were not happy with his lifestyle and he did not stay connected to them. Then he met a girl and got engaged against his parents wishes. He married her, had a couple of children and then his business went sour and his wife left him. He didn’t have a dollar in his pocket anymore. He finally decided that he wanted to call his parents and come home. He told his parents he would be arriving on a certain train, but he wasn’t even sure whether they wanted him back. So he told them that if they wanted him back, they should raise a white flag by the pole at the train station, and when he got off the train, if he saw the white flag, he would know that his parents wanted him back. Otherwise, he would just continue on the train and not have to go through the rejection.
So as they got closer to his stop, he told the man that he was afraid to pick up his head to see whether or not the flag would be there.
Sure enough, they got closer to the stop and the man saw that the entire street train station had been covered in white sheets. The parents did not want to take a chance that maybe their son would not see their flag, so they covered the entire station and white sheets.
That is how much a parent waits for his child to come home. And this does not even compare to the feelings that Hashem feels. He waits for us on Yom Kippur.
Rav Chaim Palaggi, in his sefer Moed L’Kol Chai (chapter 15,letter3), quotes a Tanna D’Dvei Eliyahu as follows:
“Hashem is sitting and waiting for the Jewish people, more than a father waits for a son. That they should repent so that He can redeem them and rebuild the Bet HaMikdash.”
Rav Chaim Palaggi says, “Whenever I read this, I start to cry. The great King, the Boss of the world, is sitting and waiting for us?!”
And what is He waiting for ? To do all the wonders of the world for us. And we just go on our merry way. We don’t realize how much Hashem is waiting for us.”
That should be our feeling, as we start getting ready for Yom Kippur.