Today we continue with our pasuk from yesterday (Tehilim 130,5 )
קִוִּיתִי ה׳ קִוְּתָה נַפְשי ׃
I hope to Hashem, my soul hopes….
In a similar pasuk, it says
נפשי לה׳
My Nefesh/ soul
There is something about the nefesh
Rabbenu Yona says in Mishleh (perek ג pasuk ו) that there are people that rely on Hashem in general. They believe that everything is in God’s hands, and they rely on Him.
They don’t rely on their power or intellect, but they don’t have reliance when it comes to the small details.
In other words, in the general, global picture they rely on Hashem, to have a good day. They rely on Hashem to make a good deal.
But they don’t realize that they’re supposed to rely on Hashem that the taxi picks them up on time, or that their coffee comes out right.
For every little detail, we have to realize that we have no strength or power to do anything. Everything is in Hashem‘s hands, and we are hoping to Him and counting on Him kindness.
That is what קִוִּיתִי ה׳ קִוְּתָה נַפְשִׁי means.
I am hoping to Hashem, my soul hopes.
The double hope conveys constant and consistent hope.
He says this approach, “is very honorable, because this conditioning will help your soul of desire receive the Bitachon.”
This is quite a mouthful.
What it means is that many people have bitachon in their heads. If they took a test, they’d score 100%. Some might even have bitachon in their hearts, in their emotions. That’s a greater level.
But is bitachon in your gut? Is Bitachon in your instincts?
To reach that level is called קִוְּתָה נַפְשִׁי
It’s in the soul. Not just in the brain or heart. He says that many people rely on Hashem on the big deals- for an overseas trip or a caravan. But for the smaller things, where there isn’t such a potential for loss, they think they don’t really have to rely on Hashem. He says that this is a mistake. We have to consistently rely on Hashem. That’s what this pasuk is saying.
קִוִּיתִי ה׳ קִוְּתָה נַפְשִׁי
I hope to Hashem, my soul hopes
This reliance will reach the soul. Rabbenu Yonah says this in Mishleh chapter 3, verse 6 and and then again in Mishleh verse 36.
He says this is the highest level of bitachon. He calls it a secret, that, “The soul of desire accepts bitachon. It’s the hope on the individual’s small, little deeds.”
Rabbenu Yonah was a master of Bitachon, and he is sharing a secret with us.
If a person wants to be a real Baal Bitachon he only gets there from the constant job of conditioning himself to rely on Hashem for every little detail of his life.
We can practice this. It doesn’t hurt, or cost any money.
Just rely on Hashem, for all the little little details of life.
When you wake up in the morning and go to shul, you might think- Do I really need God to get to Shul? It’s only three blocks away!
But as we have said in the past, studies show that most accidents happen within a mile of one’s residence. So if anything, you need more protection there! The simple reason for this statistic is that it’s where you are most often. The deeper explanation is that it’s because you don’t think you need Hashem there, so you count on yourself. But when you count on yourself, that’s when you get into trouble.
So when when you wake up in the morning, even just to get out of bed, think- Do I need Hashem to get out of bed? Yes I do. I need Hashem to get out of bed, to walk down the stairs without tripping, etc.
We don’t have to to overdose on this, but at least a few times a day, we should have in mind that we need success in what we are about to do.
Did it ever happen that you made a cup of coffee and the water was cold because the urn wasn’t hot yet?
That is just a little reminder that you need Hashem for the cup of coffee. Did you ever put salt in, instead of sugar?
The examples are endless. We need Hashem in every little detail, and the more we think like this, the more the bitachon gets into our Nefesh, our soul and our instincts, and that is the highest level of bitachon.