Welcome to the SIMHA Emotional Wellness Minute. Yesterday we discussed that the source of happiness comes from the belief that everything you have is exactly what it's supposed to be, and being happy with your lot. As we said, you need to work on this. Rav Wolbe said that the right place to focus on this is in two blessings that we make every morning in Birchot Hashachar.
One is שעשה לי כל צרכי She’Asa Li Kol Sorki, which means That God made everything for me that I need. Whether physical or spiritual, I have all the talents and all the abilities that I need in order to fulfill my purpose in life.
The second is המכין מצעדי גבר Hamechin MisAdeh Gaver/God prepares the step of man, which means that every situation that I come to in life is exactly prepared for me.
I'd like to share a fascinating story that was related by the rabbi of the Bnei Brak Hospital Mayanei Hayeshua, named Rabbi Zicherman. He once posed a question to Rav Wosner A’h, a big posek, about an elderly Jew who suffered from pains in his entire body. He was confined to his bed, and needed the help of the medical team for every action, large or small . His days, and especially his nights, had become like a continuous nightmare. He was literally unable to help himself in any way. The question was, could he make the blessing of SheAsah Li Kol Sorki/ That Hashem has done everything for me, being that he was so limited, and couldn’t take care of anything on his own.
Rav Wosner asked to meet the patient, and when he went in, it was difficult for him to see this Jew suffering so much. When the patient noticed Rav Wosner, he tried to sit up and move a bit. Of course, Rav Wosner motioned for him to stay where he was, and not trouble himself. Rav Wosner then came closer, shook his hand warmly and asked, “How are you? How do you feel?”
The patient's sighed, smiled slightly, and sighed again. Rav Wosner took advantage of the tiny smile that appeared on the patient's lips and asked, “Would you like to hear a story? When I was a young scholar, I was studying in the Yeshiva of Chochmei Lublin, under the leadership of Rav Meir Shapiro (the originator of the Daf Yomi). I was once invited by the head of the Yeshiva to come visit a Jew who was sick and unable to get out of bed.”
So he went along with the Rabbi to visit the patient at his home, and they saw that his condition was very serious. “When the patient noticed us, he smiled from ear to ear. It was a bit strange. The man was in such a difficult situation. He could hardly move, and yet he was smiling big and wide.” They asked him why, and Rav Shapiro was thrilled by the patient's answer. He said, ‘I'd be happy to get up in honor of those who come to my residence, serve them a cold drink, or maybe honor them with a warm cake. But I can't do that. The only thing I can do to make them happy and respect them is to smile at them and be happy about their visit, to respond to them with a wide and big smile. This is the only thing I can do for you, and this is my mission on earth, because that's all I'm able to do. And if that's the case, I'm going to do it with a smile as wide as I can, and more’.”
Rav Wosner finished telling the story, warmly squeezed the hand of the patient and added, “When I saw your smile, I remembered this story. You ask, ‘How can you bless Hashem for SheAsa Li Kol Sorchi when you can do nothing? ‘You feel incompetent? Not true. You have a special mission. You have the mission for your life. Smile at the people who to come to visit you. Smile at yourself. Cheer up. With Hashem's help, the situation will turn around.”
Rav Wosner continued to encourage him with warm and reassuring words, and then they left the hospital. Rabbi Zicherman, who told the story, added that he was updated by the attending physician, that surprisingly and unusually, starting from that visit, the patient's condition improved.
He began to stand up and even walk on his own, and his state of health improved astonishingly.
This is one of the most important points in emotional wellness- that, in life, a person needs to have meaning and purpose. Meaning and purpose are the keys to a person's emotional wellness. If a person feels no meaning or purpose in life, Heaven forbid…. people take their lives when they reach that point.
But it's not always easy to feel meaning and purpose. I was once talking to an irreligious therapist and he told me that it's quite difficult, when you're an atheist, to feel meaning and purpose in life. What are you? You're just a speck of dust flying through the cosmos. That's why we have to be thankful for the fact that we have our Torah, our Mitzvot and our Emunah, because that enables us to have meaning and purpose in life.
Nothing is for naught. Even if a person is in a situation like that patient, there’s still a purpose, because whatever situation you're put in, that is your purpose in life.
We will continue with this, B’Ezrat Hashem, as it's an extremely important point: Use your Emunah and Bitachon to bring about meaning and purpose in your life.