In Parashat Vayechi, Yaakov Avinu calls in Yosef, who comes in with his sons. Yaakov Avinu then requests of Yosef where he’d like to be buried, and seems to share some words of appeasement or hizuk:
וַאֲנִ֣י ׀ בְּבֹאִ֣י מִפַּדָּ֗ן מֵ֩תָה֩ עָלַ֨י רָחֵ֜ל בְּאֶ֤רֶץ כְּנַ֙עַן֙ בַּדֶּ֔רֶךְ בְּע֥וֹד כִּבְרַת־אֶ֖רֶץ לָבֹ֣א אֶפְרָ֑תָה וָאֶקְבְּרֶ֤הָ שָּׁם֙ בְּדֶ֣רֶךְ אֶפְרָ֔ת הִ֖וא בֵּ֥ית לָֽחֶם׃
When I was coming from Paddan, Rachel (your mother) died,, while I was on the road in the land of Canaan, when still some distance short of Ephrat; and I buried her there on the road to Ephrat (which is now Bet Lechem)
Rashi asks why is this coming up. Yaakov is asking to be taken to be buried somewhere else- something he didn’t do for Yosef’s mother.
Rashi continues:
וְיָדַעְתִּי שֶׁיֵּשׁ בְּלִבְּךָ עָלַי; אֲבָל דַּע לְךָ שֶׁעַל פִּי הַדִּבּוּר קְבַרְתִּיהָ שָׁם,
“I know you’re upset. You should know I buried her there based on the Dibbur/ (a way to refer to G-d).
This sounds like G-d told him to do this.
We may have learned, however, that it was for different reasons. One of them is that Yaakov Avinu kept the Torah in Eretz Yisrael, but he didn’t keep it in Chutz LaAretz (outside of Israel) and that’s why he was able to marry two sisters. Once he got to the border and was re-entering Eretz Yisrael, however, it would have been a disgrace to have two wives. So, Ramban says, since Yaakov married Rachel second, she died before he re-entered Eretz Yisrael.
She was buried on the road, and that way, he entered with one wife, Leah, who was buried with him in Maarat HaMachpelah.
This sounds like a very sad story, especially when we consider the background:
Rachel was the one that give her sister the signs that she made with Yaakov, so that Lavan wouldn’t trick him. She gave them to her sister to save her from embarrassment.
She committed a heroic act of self-sacrifice and yet she died early and was buried at the side of the road? That doesn’t seem fair. As we know, Rashi continues to explain that it was all G-d’s plan:
שֶׁתְּהֵא לְעֶזְרָה לְבָנֶיהָ
“It was to help her children,
when they went into Galut, they’d pass by and
שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר קוֹל בְּרָמָה נִשְׁמָע
Rachel would cry for her children,
יֵשׁ שָׂכָר לִפְעֻלָּתֵךְ נְאֻם ה' וְשָׁבוּ בָנִים לִגְבוּלָם
And Hashem said,
You’ll be rewarded, and your children will return”
The Midrash adds a bit more to this. The Mishnah says that when the Jews were going into exile, Hashem was planning to wipe them out completely. Abraham, Yitzhak, Yaakov, everyone pleaded with Hashem to save the Jewish people, but it was to no avail. No one could annul the decree. They’d be totally wiped out. Then Rachel came to Hashem and said, “ You know how much I loved my husband, and you know that it was I who set up the signs, so that he wouldn’t be tricked. But at the last minute, I felt bad for my sister. I couldn’t have her embarrassed, and I gave up my husband.
G-d, You’re upset that the Jewish people are doing avodah zara. Avodah zara is like a second wife. It’s competition. I was able to give up my husband to my co-wife. G-d, look away from what the Jewish people are doing.”
Her claim is what saved the Jewish people from total destruction.
And this is our lesson.
From the outside it’s like Yosef wondering why his mom got left on the side of the road. A bystander might say,
זו תורה וזו שכר?
This is Torah and this is reward?
She gives up for her sister and she ends up second fiddle, forever buried on the road like some vagrant?
We know how important Maarat HaMachpelah is, how Avraham fought for it and how all the Avot wanted to be buried there. And here she is lying on the side of the road?
And yet, if not for Rachel, there wouldn’t be a Jewish people. In the end, she’s the one that gets rewarded for the entire Jewish people, because of her self sacrifice. (As we call in Hebrew, Vitur-she gave up)
We can’t see it right away, or even a year later. It was only thousands of years later that we could see the full picture. And as great as Yosef was, he didn’t understand it. That’s our lesson. There are things happening around us that we don’t understand. It sometimes seems like great people are sacrificing, and it backfires. It looks like nice guys finish last, but that’s not the case. You have to wait for the finish line.
And Rachel finished first.
Shabbat shalom