We’re going back to the Mishnah we started yesterday. Eliezer HaModa'i says: someone who is mechalel et ha-kodashim—he treats holy meat disrespectfully; someone who is mevazeh et ha-mo'adot—he treats the holidays of Chol HaMoed (intermediate days of a festival) disrespectfully; someone who is v'malbin penei chaveiro berabim—he disgraces his friend publicly; and someone who is v'hamefer brito shel Avraham Avinu (one who violates the covenant of Abraham our father). That means either he distorts the Torah or he is brazen when it comes to mitzvot (commandments). Even though he has in his hands, there's not a portion in the World to Come.
The first question is that we have a Mishnah that says everyone has a portion in the World to Come, but these people don’t. There’s already a list of who doesn’t have a portion in the World to Come. So how is Rabbi Eliezer coming up with his own reason, his own list? I have a Mishnah that tells me these people don’t have a portion in the World to Come. The answer is that these are all listed in one of the things in Sanhedrin. In Sanhedrin, it says an apikores (heretic) does not have a portion in the World to Come. These things are classified as the actions of an apikores, and we’ll soon see how.
Let’s try to find the theme in some of these things. We always like to find the theme in these five things, all of which mean the person doesn’t have a chelek ba'Olam Haba (portion in the World to Come). Why? What’s the theme? Yavetz says—and the rabbi’s name is Dari ibn Shushan—that the person who treats the holy meat disrespectfully says, “This meat was rigged. I bought this meat—I bought this cow—from my next-door neighbor, the farmer. I got it out of the barn yesterday. What holiness does it have? It’s not holy. It’s a piece of meat. I don’t see any holiness here.” So he doesn’t appreciate the power—we’ll see in a moment—of the Jewish ability to make something holy. He doesn’t appreciate that I can say something and make it holy. I can make a lady married with my statement. The reason is that he just says it’s a plain old thing. Big deal.
Number two is the person who disrespects holidays. Why does he disrespect holidays? Because he says, “You know what the holiday is? The rabbi.” He doesn’t say—he disrespects Shabbat. He disrespects the holiday because the rabbi made the holiday. You know, it’s not a day that was made by anyone else. It’s just a—I mean, it’s a holiday. The rabbis made up a holiday. Big deal. So that doesn’t sit well with this person.
The meat came from the barn. With brit milah (covenant of circumcision), he says, “A brit milah, what’s the big deal? It happened when I was a kid.” Later, he doesn’t realize that we have the ability to put holiness onto things. There’s one theme here: he doesn’t realize he can make the meat holy; he doesn’t realize the rabbis can make a holiday holy; he doesn’t realize that a brit milah can become holy on a child, put in after he was born. Someone who insults another person doesn’t realize the holiness of the tzelem Elokim (image of God). And someone who talks negatively about the Torah says, “What did I do to it? I didn’t touch it. I didn’t do anything. Big deal.”
What’s the underlying theme? Again, as we say, he doesn’t realize the power of our ability to consecrate things. We can make children holy. We can make food holy. We can make days holy.
Now, Yavetz has a very important line. He says that the Mishnah says that even though the person has Torah and mitzvot, he still doesn’t go to Olam Haba. It doesn’t say he has teshuvah (repentance), because “teshuvah ain't davah I made me find out.” This is an important piece of information. A person who embarrasses people doesn’t have a portion in the World to Come, provided he didn’t do teshuvah. You can do teshuvah. You can feel bad about it and ask your friend for forgiveness. That’s the assault God always sets.
Getting back to why this person doesn’t have a portion in the World to Come, Yavetz says it’s because, as we said before, it all comes under heresy. What’s the heresy? The yesod of our Torah is: your mouth is powerful. You can make something holy with your mouth, and then you can take that same item, which has been made holy, and misappropriate it. You’re in trouble. These things show that he doesn’t realize he has the power to affect things with his words.
Next: mechalel et ha-kodashim. What did the person do wrong? He has no portion in the World to Come. What’s the midah k'neged midah? The person doesn’t treat holidays properly, so he doesn’t have a portion in the World to Come. It goes like this: midah k'neged midah, it’s a measure for measure. How so? He took something holy and made it tameh—that means he mixed the tumah with the kedushah. This was a purely holy item, and he wasn’t careful with it; he mixed tumah with kedushah. Similarly, holidays are holy. They’re separate from the days of the week. They have special holiness, a special way to dress, a special way to act. He’s equating them. He’s mixing holiness and the mundane. So God says that’s the opposite of Olam Haba.
Why? It says that God took the special light of the future and hid it for Olam Haba. He hid it for Olam Haba. That means the whole concept of Olam Haba is putting aside things that are supposed to be holy, putting aside things that are supposed to be holy. So this person is the opposite of that. Rather than putting aside things that are supposed to be holy—the holy light that God created at the beginning of the world, Olam Haba, pure and holy, a sanctuary of holiness—what is he doing? He’s taking holy things and making them unholy. He doesn’t belong in Olam Haba.
The same thing applies to the person who does all these things. He takes a holy Jewish person and insults and downgrades him. All these things show a lack of appreciation for designating special holy zones. If he can’t designate holy zones, he doesn’t belong with Olam Haba, which is a holy zone.
We said yesterday that we were going to touch on this point: when we say he disgraces the holidays, it doesn’t mean he’s working on Yom Tov (festival day). It means he disgraces Chol HaMoed. That’s what Rabbeinu Yonah says, and that’s what many opinions say. I’m going to go through the sources now.
First, Rabbeinu Yonah says: do you know why this person does this? Because he doesn’t take the punishment seriously. He says it’s not in the Torah. Where does it say you can’t work on Chol HaMoed? It’s not in the Torah. So a person who doesn’t take something seriously and doesn’t trust the rabbis who say it—that’s a problem. He even brings a very heavy Gemara that says the person who disgraces Chol HaMoed is like someone who worships Avodah Zarah (idolatry).
Why? It says, “Chag HaMatzot tishmor” (Guard the Festival of Matzot), “Shamor et ha-matzot” (Guard the matzot), and right next to it, “Elohei masecha lo ta'aseh lach”—don't make for yourselves gods of molten images. And the rabbis in Masechet Chagigah learn like this. This is how we know about Chol HaMoed: “Chag HaMatzot tishmor,” shelo ta'aseh melachah bechol Chag HaMatzot. Don't do work on the entire holiday, all seven days. “That's my home away I.” It says the first day and the seventh day. Yes, the first day and the seventh day are stricter, but it means the entire holiday of Pesach has to be kept, including when someone says, “Come on, when the rabbis made that up, where’d that come from? It doesn’t say that.” Anyway, he’s disgracing rabbinic law because it’s not mefurash. That borders on heresy. That’s what Rabbeinu Yonah says about treating this person so strictly.
The person who doesn’t keep Chol HaMoed for a different reason doesn’t keep it because he has a great deal that day, can’t control himself, and has to do it. He doesn’t follow the laws. Okay, that’s a different story. We’re talking about a case where it comes from the wrong hashkafah—the wrong attitude. The person isn’t keeping Chol HaMoed because of the wrong attitude.
The next thing we have to discuss is malbin penei chaveiro berabim. Rabbeinu Yonah discusses this at length, and we’re going to discuss it at length as well. What are the serious issues with malbin penei chaveiro berabim? First, we’ll do Rabbeinu Yonah in Pirkei Avot, and then we’ll do Rabbeinu Yonah in Sha'arei Teshuvah.
Rabbeinu Yonah in Pirkei Avot says—and this is an important rule—we all know there are three cardinal sins. Everybody knows there are three cardinal sins. Ed, where’s Ed? He disappeared? I don’t see Ed. Mr. Braz is here. Stash, do you want to tell us the three cardinal sins? Good, wonderful. Those are the cardinal sins.
All three cardinal sins have toladot (subcategories). They have subcategories. That means, when I say murder—let’s take an easy one—when I say giluy arayot (forbidden sexual relations), give me a subcategory of giluy arayot. It’s not quite giluy arayot, but it’s called avizrayu d'arayot. It’s a subcategory. Moses, do you know a subcategory of giluy arayot? A subcategory of giluy arayot would probably be something that leads up to it, right? So, modesty. If you hug or kiss a married lady, you didn’t actually do anything, but that’s—right. Okay, they’re serious. They’re subcategories. Since they’re related to the cardinal sins, they become more serious. A subcategory of a cardinal sin is more serious. The same subcategory is something you’re going to have to give your life for. It’s not a subcategory itself. It’s a subcategory. Maybe you’re not bowing; maybe you’re sweeping and cleaning; maybe you’re not— it’s a subcategory. So you have to die for it? What? Someone tells you to hug a lady, and you give up your life? Uh-oh, Rabbi. Well, it depends who the lady is. I’m sorry, you put a gun to your head and they ask you, “Should you jump into the river?” Is that what you want to know? Yeah. I’ll answer you privately. I don’t want Moses jumping into any rivers over the weekend.
Let’s continue. Each one has a—what do you call it? I’ll give you an example. Now we’re getting to Rabbeinu Yonah. He says, for example, etz asherah. That means you have a worship tree. It’s called an asherah tree. The tree has leaves, and someone tells you that, in order to get better, you have to eat the leaves of the Avodah Zarah tree. The Gemara says you can heal yourself from anything except asherah. Even though it’s not really Avodah Zarah, die before you benefit from it.
We’ll leave what that is exactly for now. You can look it up in Sanhedrin 75a. What is a subcategory? What is it? I told you to look it up in—oh, this is like a partial class: we get bits and pieces, and now we have to do our own homework? Yes, we can’t give you the full story now. Okay, all right.
What is a subcategory of murder? Insulting somebody, because his blood leaves his face. We consider that a subcategory of murder. That’s a little heavy. It’s embarrassing. That’s why we’re saying—I’ll have to see in a moment. The question is, it doesn’t say “a murderer.” A murderer has the—so how are we making these people worse than the murderer? He explains that in a moment. But first, we all know the Gemara: better to jump into a furnace than to embarrass your friend publicly. Does anyone know the source in the Torah for that? Yeah, yeah, it’s the rabbi and his wife who went out giving charity. They used to leave it at the front and run, and “that's the grand—they tried, good.” That’s the Gemara.
I want a story in the Torah: Yehuda and Tamar. Tamar didn’t embarrass Yehuda by saying, “I’m pregnant from him.” She said, “The one who owns these things is the one who fathered my child.” So she didn’t embarrass him. She didn’t say his name, and she was ready to die. So we have—we have one before that. Yeah. Oh, no, no, no.
So why is it so serious? This is his question. It’s a bomb question: how can you tell me that the subcategory of murder is strictly murder? It doesn’t say, of course, that you have to give your life in the case of murder. He says that when you embarrass somebody, you don’t realize how bad your sin is. You don’t feel bad, and therefore you’re very far from teshuvah. The murderer regrets his deeds. He’s sitting in his jail cell and regrets his deeds. He feels bad: “I got angry. I couldn’t control myself.” The person who goes around habitually embarrassing people doesn’t even feel bad. He’s like, “You know, okay.” He doesn’t realize he just killed somebody. So if you commit a sin and don’t feel bad about it, that sin, so to say, is worse. A heavy, big sin that you feel bad about is not as bad as a light sin that you constantly do and don’t feel bad about. He loses his Olam Haba. Yes. Exactly. He loses Olam Haba. Very scary.
Now the question is like this. Moses, I’ll ask you another question. What happens if someone comes to you, Moses, and says, “I’m putting a gun to your head. Either embarrass somebody or I’ll shoot you. I’m going to shoot you”? You’re embarrassing, of course you’re embarrassing. What do you mean? We just said teshuvah. Yeah, but you can make teshuvah. So if they put a gun to your head, can’t you sin and then make teshuvah? They put a gun to your head and say, “Sleep with a married woman or I’ll kill you.” Right? No, why? Because the act I committed by sleeping with a married woman gives her a status for the rest of her life. Can I embarrass my friend in public? “Bow to an idol. Bow to an idol, or I’ll shoot you.” So just bow, do teshuvah. Bow to an idol. Okay, that’s a little more difficult. So do teshuvah.
The answer is you can’t do it, so you can’t embarrass the person. It’s like murder, so you should have to give your life. Yeah, but that can’t be accurate. That can’t be the law. I don’t know.
Now Tosafot says in Sotah, when it says, “we better dive in,” he asks a question: why isn’t it listed among the big three? That’s his question. It should be listed under yehareg ve'al ya'avor (be killed rather than transgress). His answer is that we don’t list things that aren’t listed in the Torah. The Brisker Rav says it sounds like he should say we don’t list it because it’s not real. It’s just like we’re trying to scare you; we don’t really mean it’s so bad. Why did Tosafot say that? The Brisker Rav says it sounds like he holds that you really are supposed to give up your life. You hear that? Yeah, so what he’s saying is that it’s like a derash (interpretive exposition) to say that it’s the— No, but no. The Brisker Rav says you couldn’t say that, but Tosafot doesn’t say that. Tosafot says it is on the list. You don’t see it on the list because we don’t list things that aren’t explicit, but of course it’s on the list.
But embarrassing someone is not—it’s avizrayu d'shefichat damim. It’s a subcategory. You don’t have to give up your life for a subcategory of—you have to give up your life for a subcategory of—what do you call it? You have to give your life for a subcategory. If you commit suicide, okay, it’s not considered a sin if you’re the person who’s going to have— That’s wrong. What does it say over here, then? I don’t know what it says, but hold on, Dave. Hold on. We want to get back to this point. We have to look into this. There’s a big discussion. Chacham Ovadia has a very long discussion about whether this Gemara is meant literally or not. There are opinions that say it is literal. It’s very scary. You put a gun to your head and say, “Embarrass that guy,” and you’d rather die than embarrass him. Ridiculous. I’m with Moses. I’m with Moses. It can’t be. Okay. Okay. You want to look into it, Stash? Go look into it.
“No, what I’m saying is it’s not really killing somebody. It’s like they say: it’s like you killed somebody if you embarrassed them. You didn’t kill them. They forgot about it five minutes later. They’re living their life.” I hear you. I definitely hear what you’re saying. I’m not denying that it’s not a possibility.
The same thing applies to the punishment. Now, Stash, if you embarrass somebody, they don’t forget about it in five minutes. Being embarrassed is a feeling that lingers for a very long time.
“Rabbi, in the Holocaust people had to be policemen over the Jews, had to be policemen over other Jews, and they had to, in a lot of ways, embarrass them as well. But they had no choice. Sometimes they had to give their lives in the Holocaust, no?” We’re trying to figure out if this is for real. Stash and Moses want to know if it’s for real or not. I don’t know what to tell them. They think I’m just exaggerating. You really don’t have to. Anyone with Mars? You’re the only guy who’s thinking.
“You know, Rabbi, what if embarrassment is subjective? What if this person got embarrassed by me just calling him a nickname? Should I give up my life for that? It’s all subjective. Giving somebody a nickname—embarrassing them.” No, you go and say the guy is fat, so I say, “Hey, fatso,” and now you turn colors. So, Mars, you said I have to rather die? The gang guy comes and puts his gun to me: “If you don’t call Mars fatso, I’m going to kill you.” You’re supposed to die rather than do it, right? Okay.
“Yeah, so, Rabbi, what about when they say if you got angry, it’s like you worshipped idols? So now you tell me, if I get angry—you know what I’m saying? It’s the same analogy.” Well, here it says I didn’t really kill the guy. It says—what does that mean? It’s better to go into a fiery furnace. What does that mean? I’ll walk through, but I’ll come out alive. I’ll just run through it quick. They’re exaggerating. They don’t really mean it. What about the story with Yehuda and Tamar? She looked like she was really going to die. Okay, but that doesn’t mean it’s not like that. What is it? She was being pious. Hasidut. Hasidut. Before Matan Torah (giving of the Torah), what was she?
So what do you say, Mars? Is anyone sticking up for me? Mars Dweck? It would have to apply to getting angry also with the Avodah Zarah. Mars Dweck, are you going to stick up for me? “I gave my opinion.”
I’m doing this for Stash only, to show him that you can’t go by your own head and your own brain. Just because something sounds funny to you doesn’t mean it can’t be true. I’m going to go to his rabbi. I’m going to go to his rabbi. He probably has the book on his shelf. It’s called Yalkut Yosef. The sefer is in English. Yalkut Yosef, Perek Vav (chapter six), and Hilchot Kibbud Av Va'em. Here we go. I happen to have it on hand. I’m going to read it. You know what? I’m going to give Stash the honor of reading it inside, just so he can really take it in. So you can stick it to me? Good? Yes, go ahead. From the top there?
“Is that for real? Is that for real? Oh, maybe.” That’s his question: is it real or is it exaggerated? What a question. He got it. He hit it right on the button.
He brings down the Tosafot I told you about. Tosafot takes it seriously because Tosafot wanted to put it on the list. Let’s see what else he has. He has a long piece going back and forth, a very long piece, as usual. “Would Yosef like to go at length?” Let me see if I can find something here in a minute.
“Rabbi, what about when they embarrass the sotah in public? What does that mean? How does that fit? That’s her punishment. That’s what she deserves. The embarrassing in public? Not only the Kohen (priest) Gadol?”
Now, he brings down the Meiri. Read this, Stash. We’re not going to go through the whole thing. There are five places in the Meiri, Stash. Then, of course, like the Yosef, they go on and on and have a lot to say here—another full page on it, onward and onward. He ends off—one second, he goes on. What does Rambam hold? It sounds like there’s a discussion here. Wow, this is great. It’s a real topic. A real, real topic.
Oh, you want to read, Moses? Should I read this to you? Now that it’s in one of your steps, I can read it. “It's not fanatic, okay?” Are you ready, Moses? Moses? Okay, Stash, we’re going to read it here. Zeh leshon haRambam. Yes, let me get the spot. Zeh leshon haRambam: just like when they put a gun to your head, the same is true with sickness, and you can’t heal yourself from the three cardinal sins. Go ahead. “Right, they say you have to eat chazir (pig), eat it.” Go ahead. “He got his lipstick on a lady.” Yeah, I love the lipstick. “The doctors told him...” Go ahead. “It has to go with this girl. I noticed, though, even to look at a finger.” Exactly, die. So that goes under this concept: even though it’s not actually a sin, it’s a category of the sin, and you have to give up your life. Wow, the beach is going to be a lot of problems. I was afraid for you this Shabbat. I didn’t want anyone to tell you.
He goes on and on and on about this topic, about how real it is. I just want to go—oh, then he brings the story. Very good, Moses, with the rabbi in Mar Ukva who jumped into the furnace in the bay with the bakery, with the poor guy. He brings that down, so it sounds like a real law. It sounds like a real law.
Now he goes even further. Are you ready for this one, Moses? You and Stash, are you ready? There’s a rule: if a Kohen killed somebody, he’s not allowed to do the law. Have you ever heard that one? Moses, have you ever heard that law? “No, say it again.” If a Kohen killed someone. “No, say it again. I didn’t hear it.” What? Yeah, I know that. Yes, yes, I knew that. Morris Dweck, have you ever heard that law? “The Kaskonian.” Yes. Moses, Morris, Morris Dweck. “No, I never heard that.” The Kohen, lo aleinu, was driving in a car. He was flipped off the road, whatever it is, and killed somebody. He can’t do Birkat Kohanim (Priestly Blessing). Get ready for this question from Rabbi Yosef. This shows us how serious it is. If a Kohen embarrassed somebody, it’s like he killed a guy. Can he continue doing Birkat Kohanim? We’re trying to show you that this is not... Moses thinks it’s an exaggeration of the Mishnah here. Now I’m realizing why. He has vested interests here. He doesn’t want to be disqualified from going up for Birkat Kohanim, and he doesn’t want to believe it.
I think we have the picture: it’s not a yes-or-no answer. It’s a topic like anything else you have to learn, and your opinion is meaningless before you learn the sugya (Talmudic discussion). Moses, why is he picking on you today? Who, Moses? I know. Why are you picking on Moses? I like it. I was wrong. I was picking on Stash, really, because Stash is the one who felt there was no way this was real. We found his rabbi, Rabbi Yosef, with a six-page discussion about it. He’s going to get the exact English edition and go through it.
This is all derech eretz. It’s more than derech eretz. We’re killing you for it. This isn’t like not eating with a fork and knife. I don’t know; it’s a little more serious than that. Let’s get back to our story.
Next, hamefer brito. He desecrates the—why is that so? “Rabbi, you know, it’s funny. You answered a question I had. What gave Tamar the right to give up her life rather than embarrass someone? She was committing a sin. But now that you describe it this way, that embarrassing someone is equal to it, she’s actually justified in her actions.” Correct. Good.
What does it mean that a person desecrates the brit milah? The Gemara in Eruvin says that whoever has a brit milah doesn’t go into Gehenna (place of punishment), and Abraham stands outside and pulls him out. The problem is the person who doesn’t keep his milah (circumcision). That’s why he won’t get into Olam Haba: he doesn’t have that protection from milah. Now, what does it mean that you don’t have a brit milah? “It's sung by the guy.” I don’t want to get into this now, but if he breaks his milah, it means he sleeps with a lady who isn’t from our faith. That’s considered desecrating your brit milah. Of course, if it happened to anyone, we believe in teshuvah. But you need teshuvah for all these things; otherwise, you’re in trouble.
What does the last one mean? The last one was megaleh panim baTorah shelo kehalacha: he distorts the Torah. He mentioned this yesterday. It either means he does a mitzvah but doesn’t do it openly, b'farhesya—he does it openly—or it means he distorts the Torah. What does that mean? The Midrash Shmuel says, from the Meiri, that he takes the Torah and likes to say it’s all mashal. He takes the Torah and says it’s a mashal. For example, “Oh, you know it says don’t eat chazir. ‘Don’t eat chazir’ really means that you should have good midot. Don’t be like the chazir, which is no good inside but looks good outside. It doesn’t really mean don’t eat chazir.” So again, that person is distorting the Torah, distorting the Torah.
Sha'arei Teshuvah describes something similar: a person who says all these stories in the Torah don’t really belong, and other kinds of nonsense. Bible critics. And he says this fellow, where did it all come from? Where do most koferim (heretics) come from? He says he doesn’t understand it because of his lack of understanding. Rather than admit that he’s a fool, he’ll taunt and make fun of something else he doesn’t understand.
He quotes a pasuk (verse) in Devarim that says about the Torah that it isn’t empty from you. If it looks empty, it’s because you have a problem. Whenever you see something wrong with the Torah, it’s not that the Torah has a problem. It’s like saying, “Rashi doesn’t make any sense.” No, it’s not that Rashi doesn’t make any sense. You don’t make any sense. Your brain isn’t working, so you don’t understand Rashi. Never say, “This Gemara doesn’t make any sense.” Every Gemara makes a lot of sense. Every Rashi makes a lot of sense. Every Mishnah makes a lot of sense. You might not make a lot of sense. Your head doesn’t understand it properly. The problem is not you've got a potato head and you want to know why I don't understand the Gemara.
That’s why the person who is megaleh panim baTorah shelo kehalacha again acts from disdain. Another example he gives is a person who says, “What do we gain from people learning Torah? They learn Torah; they’re benefiting themselves.” He’s denying a pasuk where God tells Noah—God told Noah, sorry, God told Abraham—“There have to be ten tzadikim (righteous people) in Sedom, I would save the city.” This person is saying he doesn’t believe in what talmidei chachamim (Torah scholars) are doing. He’s under that category.
That’s the end of Mishnah number—up to number 11. What could it mean? What could it mean? There are 70 ways to learn any Gemara. We’re going to start Mishnah Yud Bet. Give me a second to pull it up. It’s a very short Mishnah, and let’s bring it up. With three minutes to go, we’ll start the Mishnah, a little bit of a cryptic Mishnah.
The Mishnah says like this: Rabbi Yishmael says, hevei kal la-rosh. David Shabbat is going to translate for us because it’s very cryptic. We want a simple English translation. “Do you have the Mishnah, Dave?” “Yes.” “Do you want to read it to me?” In English: “By yielding to a superior, one should exhibit subservience in the presence of men of stature, rather than seeking to inflate his own image. One should view himself as lightweight, insignificant in comparison to those of great spiritual eminence.”
Good. It means “be light to a head.” “Be light to a head” means if someone is a leader, be light with him, easygoing.
Do you want to read the literal translation? Just the Mishnah. “Some with black hair on their head.” How do they translate the Mishnah without the commentary, Dave? Just the English Mishnah. Rabbi Yishmael says, “Be yielding to a superior, be pleasant to a young man, and receive every person cheerfully.” Okay, be pleasant to the young. The word tishchoret means young, even though the person is shachor—only has black hair—be pleasant to him. And lastly, mekabel et kol ha-adam b'simcha. Greet everybody with happiness.
Now let’s read for a second what the Rambam says for two minutes, and then, be'ezrat Hashem, we’ll continue the Mishnah on Monday. She says like this: when you’re in front of an adam gadol (great person), you have to be calm, lower yourself, get off your high horse, and not give yourself respect. But when you’re with a lad, someone with black hair, don’t lower yourself. The opposite: you have to say, “I’m 53; this guy is 23. I’m not going to act like a 23-year-old.” Now is the time to give yourself respect. Don’t become a child like he’s a child. You have to know when to hold your own, when to give yourself respect, so to say, and when to pass on the respect.
So that’s the case I told you about: this guy who’s a 23-year-old, don’t drop down onto his maturity level. Fine, that’s true, but still don’t give him an angry face or ignore him. You still have to give him a feeling of happiness, but that doesn’t mean you’re going to drop yourself down to his level. And that’s the end of our Mishnah for now, and we will tell everybody a wonderful, meaningful fast. Hopefully we’ll see you at 6 o’clock for those of us that are joining the 6 o’clock class.