We continue with the topic of bitachon and technology, and how they intersect.
Why is it that many people have a challenge leaving their cell phones out of shul? They may leave if off, but still feel a need to check it from time to time (we aren’t even discussing the people who leave their ringers on- that is obviously not within proper synagogue decorum).
Some people won’t check their phone until Baruch She’amar, others won’t check until after Amida, some people pull their phones out right after Alenu… there are different levels of when people feel the need to check their phones.
If you ask them why they need to check their phones, or why they can’t just leave them in their car and check it an hour later, they will say they’re worried about missing an important call. Who knows what could happen has v’ shalom….
One answer we might give them is that they don’t work for Hatzolah. Baruch Hashem, if there’s a need, there are emergency responders and that isn’t one of their jobs.
But what if his wife has to reach him, he’ll say…
So, firstly, there is the anxiety rule of Probable vs Possible:
How probable/often is it that your wife actually needs you in the middle of prayers? It’s possible, but not probable.
Someone once complained to Rav Nissim Karelitz, the Gadol of Bnei B’rak, about the Rosh Kollel’s rule that they were not permitted to have their phones in the Bet Midrash. For three hours he’d be out of contact with the world. He said his wife was pregnant. What would happen?
The rabbi told him, “I had ten children without a cell phone.” People used to live their lives without them.
But come on, they’ll say…… people also lived without cars.. we have things we need.
And yes, we do have needs. But the question is, at what price?
The following bitachon point may help:
Some people once came to Rav Shach asking that the entire Ponevezh Yeshiva take a CPR course. Imagine 2,000 responders on the streets, they said. For some reason that I can’t recall, he was not in favor of this proposal.
Someone told him, “What do you mean? Last week someone took a CPR course. Right after he finished the course, he was out walking when a baby fell out of a window! He did CPR and saved the baby!” Rav Shach answered, “If the man would not have taken the course, the baby would never have fallen out the window.”
Does that mean that he caused the baby to fall out the window? Of course not.
But Rav Shach explained that obviously the baby was not supposed to die, because if he had been, the responder would not have been there. Obviously, it was decreed on Rosh Hashanah, that this baby was not supposed to die. If the man wasn’t there (but he would’ve been needed to bring the baby back to life), then the baby could not have fallen out the window.
Does this mean we’re not supposed to do our hishtadlut? Are we not supposed to have Hatzolah? Of course we are, but when we do our hishtadlut, it has to follow the guidelines.
We have to ask ourselves what is called hishtadlut and what is called over-hishtadlut?
According to the vast majority of the Rabbinate, having your phone during prayers is not considered a necessary hishtadlut.
You don’t have to have your phone, and therefore, if you don’t have your phone, those issues that might come to disturb you will not happen.
Or ultimately, if they do happen, they’ll happen for the right reasons.
Hashem can’t ask you to do something that you don’t need to do.
A young man told me the following: He learns a night seder for an hour or so each night. He does not bring his phone into the place where he learns. He has a wife who goes places, but he decided that he can go an hour and a half without his phone.
A week or so ago, when he got back to his car and checked his phone, he saw five missed texts from his wife. The first text said that she was leaving New Jersey to go to Brooklyn, and that she arrived safely. The second text said that she walked out and saw that she had a flat tire. In her third text, she told him she needed help.
The fourth text said she’d try to call Haverim, and fifth text said Haverim came, changed her tire and now she was heading back home.
The man realized that had he seen the first few texts, they would’ve ruined his whole night.
But since he waited until everything was over, he saw that it all worked out!
I hope I’m not ruffling too many feathers, and I hope everybody gets the point, which is that if you have a certain level of bitachon, you are able to cut off from technology in a normal way. People do not need to be connected 24/7.
There are probably people who take their phone into the shower because they are afraid they will miss an important call!
There is no end.
At a certain point, you have to say, “Hashem only wants me to do what is normal, and what needs to be done. After that, I’ll leave it to Him.”
Have a wonderful day.