Today is Asara B’Tevet. As we’ve mentioned the past, although it's a short fast, in the middle of the winter, Asara B’Tevet is extremely important. God tells Yehezkiel, “Etsem Hayom Hazeh/This is very day.” And we use that term in our Selichot as well-this very day. So happened on this very day? Yes, it was the day that the siege was laid in Yerushalayim. But it sounds like there's something inherent in the day, to the point that the Bet Yosef quotes the Avudarham, that if Asara B’Tevet would come out on a Shabbat, we would fast on Shabbat ( They worked the calendar out so that It doesn't) and it Asara B’Tevet comes out on a Friday, we fast on Friday. Beause it's in that very day. What happened on that very day? The Yarot Dvash makes an interesting calculation. He tells us that the third of Tevet is the day that Kayan killed Hevel. And the decree on Kayin to go into exile, Na V’Nad/ to be a wanderer was decreed seven days later, on Asara B’Tevet. So that was the day that it was decreed for Kayin the murderer, to go into exile…and forever after, that's the day where it's going to be decided whether the Jewish people, based on Sinat Hinam, should go into exile or not.
So what are we supposed to do on this day besides commemorate it by fasting? The Mishna Berura says the main point of the fast day is not the fast, but rather contemplation. So we should contemplate the sin of Kayin that brought about this problem. What exactly was the sin of Kayin? Rav Wolbe brings it down, in his sefer Alei Shor (vol 1). He talks about the common concept of a boy in yeshiva (this can apply to anybody) who, as time goes on, looks at the world through everyone else's lenses, and he only sees everyone else's qualities. He sees how everyone is faster, smarter, stronger, taller and everything else.
And he starts, slowly but surely ,not seeing any of his own qualities. And
Rav Wolbe quotes a pasuk in Mishleh, “Kinah/jealously causes the bones to rot.”
What does that mean? Your bones are your etsem, your essence. Kina/jealousy causes your essence to wither away, because you're always looking at everybody else and don't develop yourself.
Rav Nosson Wachtfogel says, in his sefer on Elul, that the first Mussar class ever given in the Torah is when God talks to Kayin.
When does God talk to Kayin? After Kayin tried to do a good thing and his brother copied him. Kayin’s good deed was not accepted, but his brother’s (who copied him) was. The root of the name Kayin is the same as Kina/ Jealousy. He was jealous of his brother. So God comes to give him a mussar class and tells him, “If you do good, you'll lift yourself up.”
Rav Wolbe says that is the fundamental of success in Avodat Hashem. You can't look at yourself through other people's glasses. And he quotes the Or HaChaim HaKadosh that says the following powerful line: Kayin was rejected by whom? Not by his parents, not by his teachers, not by his spouse, and not by his siblings. God Himself said, “I don't want your Korban.” So what's the answer? God says, “If you do good, you’ll lift yourself up.” To which the Or HaChaim says, Kedusha does not need Haskamot/endorsement.
If you do something right, you don't need a pat on the back. Your deeds will lift you up. The Or HaChaim points to a story in the Gemara in Bava Metzia 85B, where two great rabbis, Rav Hanina and Rav Hiya were arguing with each other. Rav Hanina said, “You're arguing with me?! If the Torah
would be forgotten, I could bring it back with my tremendous depth, my pipul.”
And Rav Hiya replied, “You're arguing with me? I caused that the Torah wasn't forgotten! What did I do? I planted flax and I made nets, then I took the nets and I captured deer, I slaughtered the deer and I gave the meat to orphans. Then I made scrolls out of it and wrote the five books on the scrolls. Then I went to a town and I taught five children, and I had each child teach another child…” And he goes on to describe what he did to make sure Torah was not forgotten. And on that, it says, “Great are the deeds of Rav Hiya. He made it so the Torah was not forgotten.”
Then the Gemara says there was certain rabbi that once wanted to see the students in the Yeshiva Shel Mala/ heavenly Yeshiva, but the tour guide told him, “You can look at anybody, but you can't look at Rav Hiya’s chair.”
How would he know it was Rav Hiya’s chair? Because all of the other chairs were being brought up by angels. The only chair that went up on its own was Rav Hiya’s. Therefore, you can't look at him. The Or HaChaim proves from this story that Rav Hiya is the one that did a good deed, and wasn't concerned with other people's appreciation or compliments, so he rose on his own. He wasn't the deepest teacher or learner. He didn’t have all the pilpul. He was a Pre1A teacher.
He didn't get all the fanfare, but he made sure that the Torah was not forgotten. And he did what he had to do with his abilities and his kelim/tools. And that's the point. Everyone has the tools that they need for their success. This is an important point, and it’s the message of Asara B’Tevet. The message is, don't make Kayin’s mistake. Look at your qualities. You have what you need to do to fulfill your mission in life.
Have a wonderful day and a meaningful fast.