Welcome to Emotional Wellness Daily, a project of SIMHA, the Sephardic Initiative for Mental Health Awareness.
We've been talking about a term that we coined, selfish spirituality which Rav Wolbe discusses at length. Of course, there are no coincidences. Originally, I was reading from his essay in sefer Aleh Shor, but I was just looking through my library, and I stumbled upon another place where he wrote about this earlier on, more at length, and with a bit of a positive twist, which we always like to hear. Until now, we've been beating up this instinct that we have toward spirituality, saying that it's selfish, etc. But he writes that we need this force, that it will bring us to perfection in religion. He says that we need to have a natural conditioning.
We pray, Targilenu B’Toratecha/ Habituate us in Torah.
On one hand, the term hargel is not good. Hargel means you're just on automatic pilot. You're just doing things out of rote. But without that rote, that fundamental conditioning, it would be a daily fight to do every mitzvah. Nothing would be natural. We wouldn't be wearing Tsitsit, putting on tefilin, doing Netilat Yadayim, making Berachot or learning…. all of that is really built on that natural instinct of closeness to God.
So yes, this natural instinct is not fear of God, it's not piousness, but it's the natural spiritual sowing of the ground to grow. Without it, a person would never reach real Yirat Shamayim, or real Emunah. Of course, we can't use this alone. You have to use your Da’at, you have to use your understanding. But any instinct that God gives us is not something we're supposed to get rid of. All instincts are necessary. He quotes one of the great psychologists (he doesn't say who) who wrote, regarding most of his patients above age 35, that by and large, what they really were suffering from was they did not find a connection to God. When they found a connection to God, they were healed. And he says, those are goyim, so how much more so for a Jewish person.
But if that's the case, he asks, how come everyone's not religious? The answer is that instincts can be suppressed. He gives the example of soldier that goes into war. He is putting aside his instinct for self-preservation, which is the strongest of instincts. He's putting his life in danger. Why? Because what he calls the ecstasy of protecting the birthplace suppresses that instinct of self-preservation. And so too, this spirituality that people have, and especially that Jewish people have, can be suppressed by another force, such as a desire for pleasure. I might feel that I can't enjoy myself in this world if I follow my spiritual instinct, so I'll suppress it. Or I might be influenced by the masses. Other people that are intellectual might think that it's not scientific to be religious, and therefore, since they're embarrassed, the embarrassment suppresses their religion.
Everyone has that spiritual side to them. It's just a question of whether or not they suppress it.
There are people that might want to pray or act in certain ways, but they're afraid of what their colleagues or peers will say. We call it peer pressure.
Rav Wolbe says the first step is to understand that you have, inside of you, this natural spiritual tendency, which is really what you need to start.
He adds that it's very superficial to separate people into two groups, religious and not religious.
He says, naturally, we're all religious. It’s just that certain people suppress their religious tendencies and overcome it with other forces.
We shouldn't walk away thinking that the natural spirituality is only detrimental. It, of course, was given to us by God and has strong, positive, implications.
Having a wonderful day.
