We continue with the concept of the power of wanting. When it comes to doing a mitzvah, Bitachon only comes in at the final step, which is the desire to see the mitzvah come to fruition. Before that, in the wanting to do the mitzvah or committing to do it, there is no room for Bitachon. That part is up to you, and there’s nothing that can stop you from wanting to do something.
In Masechet Taanit, there is a beautiful story about Rav Hanina Ben Dosa, that illustrates this concept and teaches us a powerful lesson.
Rav Hanina was a great tzadik, but he was extremely poor. It says in the Gemarah Berachot that everyday, a heavenly echo would call out that the whole world was being taking care of in the merit of Rav Hanina Ben Dosa, and yet he survived on only a pound of carob each week.
So, we see that he was a great tzadik who was very poor.
The Gemarah in Taanit tells us that one day, Rav Hanina’s wife got upset. Her neighbor had insulted her, and she just she couldn’t handle the poverty anymore. She asked Rav Hanina to pray for them. So, he prayed, and a hand came down from heaven and left them a gold bar! They were set!
But then they had a dream that night, that all the tzadikim in the world to come were sitting at a table with 3 legs, but their table only had 2 legs.
Rav Hanina’s wife awoke from the dream and asked her husband to pray to G-d that the gold bar be taken back. She didn’t want a table with only two legs.
So Rav Hanina prayed, and the hand came back and took the gold bar.
The Gemarah tells us that this second miracle was greater than the first.
But there are some questions.
1- Why was everyone sitting at a three-legged table? Wouldn’t four legs be more suitable for a table?
2- What did he do wrong? All he wanted was to give charity. Why did they have to lose out on the next world for that?
The sefer Yarot Devash, and a Rishon, explain that Rav Hanina wanted to give Sedaka. What he didn’t understand was that his wanting to give was more powerful than his actual giving could have been. If you give, how much can you give? You can’t support the whole world! And, who says you’ll give to the right people?
But the want to give is pure.
In his wanting, G-d considered Rav Hanina Ben Dosa like he gave the whole world. And in truth, his acceptance of G-d’s will was what brought parnasa to the world.
So, the gold bar actually took away from his wanting, and therefore, from his world to come.
Regarding the three legs rather than four, our rabbis explain that this world, and Olam Haba, stand on 3 pillars:
על שלושה דברים עומד העולם
Learning Torah, Avodah (prayer) and acts of hessed.
תורה, עבודה וגמילות חסדים
When Rav Hanina took the gold bar, the leg he lost was the pillar of hessed. By limiting his charity to the ability of actual giving (as opposed to the limitless level of wanting), he was actually losing out on his hessed. That’s a tremendous Hiddush for those of us that might not be able to afford to give: When you sit through a drive, and hear everyone giving $18,00, or $26,000, know that your $101, your Matanat Yado or even your zero, is powerful.
The Sefer Hasidim, written 800 years ago by the pious Rav Yehuda Hahasid, says that a person shouldn’t say, “I’m a poor man. I can hardly support my family. If I was wealthy, I would give. What can I do?”
He says, רחמנא לבא בעי - G-d wants your heart.
It’s about what you want.
Furthermore, he quotes our story:
He points out that Rav Hanina Ben Dosa was poor, and still supported the whole world. He also mentions Rav Shimon bar Yochai, who was in a cave for 13 years. He wasn’t giving charity, and yet he protected the whole world.
He writes that the ability to be challenged in parnasa, and accept it, is greater than Sedaka.
The fact that one can accept G-d’s will, and not think that G-d is doing the wrong thing,
הקב״ה חשוב לו לטובה ולזכות, יותר מצדקה
To G-d, it’s more than the charity he would’ve given.
The whole world is surviving on him.
Furthermore, he writes that all the pain and difficulties,
הקב״ה מחליף בטובות, ומשפיע טובה לכל העולם, ומעלין עליו כאלו הוא נותן מידו
Hashem turns into goodness, to bring bounty to the whole world. It’s as if he supported the whole world.
He is the ultimate philanthropist, just by wanting to give.
What a powerful lesson!
For those of us that can give, give!
And if you can’t give, want!
No one can stop you from wanting.
Have a great day.