Welcome to Emotional Wellness Daily. In Parashat Toldot the Torah describes how Yitzhak Avinu tries to dig a well, and it doesn't work,they fight about it… so he tries another well and it doesn't work, and they fight about it…. And finally they have a well that no one fights about.
The Chafetz Chaim asks what the lesson is. Why is the Torah telling us this? He answers that it’s to teach us that a person should never let go of a business that he is involved in. He shouldn't despair, he shouldn't give up. Yitzhak Avinu dig and didn't find water, dug again and didn't find water. And finally they made a well, and named it Rechovot, which means peace, or tranquility.
The Chafetz Chaim says that this is how it works with all physical and spiritual areas, whether business or learning. If you're not successful at the beginning of your learning, don't give up. In the end you’ll be successful. If you’re not successful in the beginning of your business, don't give up. You'll be successful.
This is an important rule. Rav Yerucham Levovitz speaks about this in sefer on Elul and Rosh Hashana, where he quotes the Gemara in Berachot 3B, that if someone prays and wasn’t answered, he should pray again. Like the Pasuk says in Tehilim 27,14,
קַוֵּ֗ה אֶל־ה׳ חֲ֭זַק וְיַאֲמֵ֣ץ לִבֶּ֑ךָ וְ֝קַוֵּ֗ה אֶל־ה
Hope to Hashem, strengthen your heart and hope to Hashem.
Obviously, this has to do with hope, but this pasuk is also about resilience: Hope, and if it doesn't work, hope again. And if it doesn't work, hope again.
Rabbenu Yona, in Mishleh, chapter three says, Simply, you learn that it’s a message just in resilience. Hope to Hashem, strengthen your heart and hope to Hashem. But he says, hope to Hashem, and when you hope to Hashem, that in itself will strengthen your heart. Your hope will give you the ability to have more hope. And that hope will give you the ability to have more hope, and so on….in a snowball effect.
People make a mistake, says Rav Yerucham. They say, “Well, if it didn't work and I wasn't answered, it must be that I'm not deserving. Enough already.”
But that’s a mistake. Don’t stop. Keep going, keep pushing. Moshe Rabbenu didn't give up even after 515 prayers.
He would have kept going. One more and he would've made it, but Hashem told him to stop. Rav Yerucham then quotes from the same Gemara that says there are four things that need hizuk: Torah, good deeds, prayer and business. Rashi says that you have strengthen yourself with all your efforts, but what does this mean in business?
He says, whether you're a craftsman, or a businessman, stick to your business or whatever you're doing. If you're a Ben Torah, stick to what you are doing. Don't throw in the towel. He says that is the secret to success. Success is dependent on sticking to what you have, and not jumping around. When you keep on switching around, things don't work.
There's a saying, HaAkshan Yatzliach/The stubborn one will be successful. It's true in business, and it’s true in whatever you do,l. You have to keep pushing. Rav Wolbe writes this in Alei Shor, when he talks about Avodat Hashem- you may try to work on a certain Middah and it doesn't look like it's working. You don't see yourself getting better. But, he says, Keep pushing, keep working. That, as we said, is the modern term of resilience. Just keep pushing forward.
It’s a lesson that's constantly brought up. And it’s the secret of success.
We have one more beautiful, close- to-home story, told about my wife’s sister’s mother in law, Mrs Friedman.
In the early 1940’s, the Nazis, ימח שמם- may their memory be wiped out, were preparing to invade Hungary. Everyone feared the worst. At a time when most Jews were in despair, a wealthy man named Lomze Dirr decided to make a lively Sefer Torah dedication with music and dancing. The people were asking him, “What’s the point of all of this; it looks like we are not going to survive and neither is the Sefer Torah.” He replied, “It is true, I might not survive and this Torah may not survive, but I know that there are children who will survive. When they see the honor that we are giving to the Torah in this situation, it will inspire them to honor the Torah throughout their lifetimes.” The dedication was made, and, indeed, it brought about a tremendous glory to the Torah.
Then, a few years ago, a Torah dedication was made by Mrs. Friedman, a Holocaust survivor. At the dedication, the story of Lomze Dirr was told with an extra detail: At the Torah dedication in Hungary in the early 40, there was an eight year old girl present, who was hungry because there wasn’t enough food around. But she was also inspired- so inspired that she vowed to one day dedicate her own Sefer Torah. She survived and eventually settled in America and saved money her entire lifetime. And about 75 years later, Mrs. Friedman fulfilled her vow and again brought about a tremendous glory to the Torah. Lomze Dirr did not survive, nor did the Torah he dedicated. But, the lesson he taught us and his display of self-sacrifice and hope will last forever. Even in the darkest times, they rise to the challenge.
These are the qualities of our success. That's why we keep going.