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Welcome to the SIMHA Wellness Minute. Today we will talk a little bit more about empathy, which, as Rav Wolbe explains (see yesterday's class) doesn’t just mean seeing what you think they need, but what they really need. When Hashem comes to save the Jewish people, the words used are, ״VaYeda Elokim/and God knew.״ Rashi says that God placed His heart and and did not allow His eyes to ignore them.
Why is it that the word VaYeda/to know is used?
It should have said God looked at them, God paid attention to them. The Ramban ays there’s a secret here- that God used His Da’at. God used His knowledge. Rav Wolbe, in Alei Shur, (vol one page 189)
explains that there's a concept of knowledge (which we spoke about a while ago) that can be used on yourself. We call it self-awareness or Da’at HaDa’at /knowledge of knowledge, to be able to know yourself, and focus on what's going on inside of yourself.
That same power of Da’at has to be used on others. That means you don't just look at somebody. You take your conscious, or your awareness, and apply it to somebody else. That means not focusing on the constant ego-sourced thoughts that are going on in your head.
As we said, Da’at is the power of connecting. We can put ourselves
Into a situation; we can watch the movie of life and get so engrossed that we're living the movie, whether it's the movie of life or the fictitious movie on television, in the movie theater, where you get so engrossed in it that suddenly you gasp when the car almost goes off the cliff, even though you know it's only fictitious. Your conscious became part of the movie. We become part of our inner movie as well, when we're anxious, or sad, although it's really our outlook that we're identifying with that's causing us the sorrow. But let's put all of that aside and talk about using all of that awareness and conscious on somebody else. That's what Vayeda Elokim means- to be totally engrossed and involved in somebody else's situation, to contemplate their situation. The same description is used when Moshe Rabbenu’s involved with the Jewish people is described. In Shemot (perek ב pasuk יא (it says, ויאר בסבלתם
he saw their heavy load, and Rashi says he placed his eyes in his heart, the same term used when God gets involved with the problems of Jewish people. So too, with Moshe Rabbenu. That's why he was the leader, as we will see later. That is the trait of Noseh B’Ol, which we can loosely translate as Empathy, because although it might not capture it, it's as close as we can get in English to what it means
to carry the load, to get involved in someone else's problem. This is a human quality. Animals cannot do this. Animals are cruel. There's no concept of mercy, when a tiger is about to eat a sheep. He doesn't think about the sheep’s family; he doesn't think about anything. An animal doesn't have that ability to know himself or to know others. This is a human trait, and it’s the source of our ability to have empathy.
The story is told that Rav Yerucham Levovitz once went to visit a person who was sick, with pains in his body
(I don't remember the exact details). On his way out, he asked the student who was accompanying him how many times he turned over at night. The student said he didn’t know. They started talking and thinking how many times a person turns over at night (studies today say it’s about 40 times a night), and the student was surprised. What did that have to do with visiting this person? Rav Yerucham explained that this person was in tremendous pain, and every time he turned at night, he further suffered.
That is what it means to put your Da’at into someone else.
It’s not just a visit to the person, in and out with a, “Refuah Shelemah.” To use your Da’at means getting totally involved in the other person's situation.
Have a wonderful day.