One of the most challenging people to get to meet and know is actually none other than ourselves. Who are we? Psychologists tell us that at the age of 30, about 97% of our decisions are made by others. By others, I mean outside sources, influences that come throughout our lives as we grow, etc. At the age of 30, we're bombarded by so many things. Who are we? Are we really making decisions that are our own? So when I say we meet ourselves, how difficult is that? It's almost impossible. Our choices are made by others.
I'll give you a simple example: fashion. In the world of fashion, you like a certain color, you like a certain item, and then all of a sudden it's out of the market. Why? Because fashion designers decided that now it's going to be the next color or the next shape or the next item that comes into the fashion world. And what happens? Very quickly, we buy it. And we like it. Where is our decision in that? You know how scary this is? That means that what's going on on campuses these days, where you have masses of people protesting against Israel, etc., has a tremendous impact on the Jewish people who are not set in their philosophical and ideological beliefs, and maybe even theological beliefs. And those things have so much impact on the human being that very slowly the inside of you disappears.
Hashem comes to Avraham Avinu (Abraham our father), and he tells me, “If you want to really discover me, Lech Lecha, you're going to have to leave for yourself for the purpose of finding the Lecha, because if you don't go away both physically and mentally from a certain place, it will be impossible to know who the Lecha—who you truly are.” And so in our lives there's always this call from Hashem to us that says, Lech Lecha: you have to discover yourself, you have to meet yourself, you have to be able to meet yourself throughout your life. And that is impossible to do when you're being bombarded by society. Well, at the end of the day, we don't have to live like marginals; we have to live in society. How do you do that? I would like to suggest something practical that could help this. In order to meet ourselves and to really discover who we are, we need to have that moment of being alone, what's called, actually, in the Hasidic books, being by yourself. But being by yourself doesn't have to be in a physical manner. I think it has to be in a mental way.
Today, we don't have a moment when we're alone because we have those devices called iPhones or Samsung phones, whatever, that you're using, and you're being bombarded time after time. If it's not the email, it's a text, so WhatsApp, it's a TikTok, it's a what—all these things that come our way and don't let us breathe for a second, to be able to meet ourselves even for a few moments.
I have decided to put my phone down when it comes to family dinner. I have decided to put my phone down when I studied Torah. I have decided to put my phone down as much as I can, to put it away, because that way it's the only way to find yourself. This little escape into our busy schedule, that voice that should be telling us every day, for a moment: “Lech Lecha! Go find your family! Go for yourself, find yourself a moment when you are by yourself.” And that is the only way to recharge this battery of you, to meet you, to be you.