It doesn't work. Rabbi, it does not work. You know how many times I had people come to me and tell me, “Rabbi, I try my very best. Every time I decide I'm not going to look, it doesn't work.” The frustration on people's faces was strong, so I decided to look for a solution. I searched and found a very big Chiddush (novel insight), and I would like to share it with you.
At the end of the sefer Nefesh HaChaim, there's a small sefer called Etz HaChaim. Over there, he says a very big Chiddush. I would like to read it to you: “Watching things that one should not. One has to pray for this. One has to beg Hashem for help. And this is a generality. Anybody who is trying hard and trying to control himself, even from just a gaze, just from looking, afterwards, it will burn inside him like a fire.” Nefesh HaChaim has a very interesting concept that he'd like to share. For many people, trying to control ourselves in this area is very difficult. So he says, instead of trying to control yourself so much, try a different way, a different route.
It's like Lashon Hara. When you talk Lashon Hara about someone, it means that you have a bad view on that person. So instead of working on the mouth, work on your view of people. Try to judge others favorably. Here he says it's the same thing. Instead of trying to control our gaze, he says, let's try to reroute our interests. Pray to God from the heart and say, “Hashem, I don't want to look because I don't want to be interested in that.” Take, for example, that we live in Miami on Collins Avenue. There are beautiful cars that pass. You have Bugattis, you have Lamborghinis, you have Rolls Royces. All the boys, whenever they hear a loud noise, they look. And sure enough, it's a beautiful car. You're going to see that people—women generally—are not really so interested in nice cars. So they're just not going to look. Which means that looking or not looking has to do with the interest I have in the item.
Here Nefesh HaChaim says, let's pray to HaKadosh Baruch Hu (The Holy One, blessed is He) deeply and sincerely: “I do not want to have an interest over there. It is not something I would like to pursue.” We pray from the heart. Hashem helps.